Her
by Shmootzie
Summary: The Master, drum free, regenerates in a woman and once again starts planning how to conquer the Universe. But with the drums gone, she can hear the Doctor, her old connection to him clear out from noise. And he is not having a good time at all. She tries to ignore it , but things are never easy when they involve the Doctor.
1. Her

She wakes up, with his screaming in her head, and she sits up, sweaty and with a knot in her stomach.  
"Hun?" her asleep husband ask and she mumbles an apology and it is ok, just a dream. He answers by cuddling her in his arms and she settles for a while, until he falls asleep. She can hear the distant scream, and someone, somewhere is hurting the Doctor.  
Good.  
The Master with a brand new female body, lies back and rests her head on the pillow, next to her new husband, a millionare from planet Xiuxtu. His fortune will be enough to get herself a couple of nice ships and some mercenaries.  
Conquests should start somewhere after all.

* * *

She continues to hear the Doctor, like an echo in the back of her head. Most of the time he is running, adrenaline and the heat of the moment, erasing all emotions and worries, focus in solving the problem and saving the day. Sometimes, very rarely, he is happy and content, feeling safe and proud.

But is usually at night, when he is not running and all is quiet, that there is nothing but guilt and self hatred, which she can hear it, loud and clear.  
The drums used to fill her mind, keep everything out. Almost a blessing, but really, she is happy to be rid of them, allows her thoughts to be clear, without the fits of insanity she used to suffer. So now her plans are more careful, more strategic.

She is as passionate as ever in the conquest of the universe,. It has nothing to do with the Doctor. Romana got it wrong, her appetite for power and war is not a stunt to get the attention of that old self righteous bastard.

The Doctor can fuck himself, for all she cares.

That night she kills her husband, it is a little more viciously than she intended. The Doctor is sad and hurt and his nightmares scream so loud. It makes her angry. Where the hell are his little companions to kiss it better?

As she looks at the mangled corpse in front of her, she knows it is a lost cause. No way she can say it was an accident. With a sigh, she cleans her knife and walks towards the closet, taking out her bloodstained dress.

She watches herself in the mirror and smiles, pleased at what she sees. She is a petite thing, this is her shortest incarnation. She has tanned skin and big brown doe eyes and her cheeks are salted with freckles. Her lips are thin but expressive. Her hair is dye brown.  
She regenerated ginger and for Rassilion´s sake, she hates gingers.

She chooses a blue dress, and if it happens to be Tardis blue, it is just a coincidence.


	2. Help

She is on her honey moon with her wife, a beautiful woman called Melixta, who happens to be a heiress. Melixta is beautiful and gentle, the Master finds she loves her and her beautiful indigo skin. She has always loved beautiful things. Even if she can´t help destroying them.

When she kills her, The Master thinks she will be very gentle with this delicate woman . Kind. She can be kind when she puts her mind on it.

Eventually , inevitably, as every night, her thoughts go back to him. The Doctor is quiet has been running a lot lately.  
As in cue, the universe chooses that moment for the Doctor´s anguish and pain slamming at her in the form of a terrible scream that goes on for too long to be his usual self pity and guilt.

Something is wrong.

The Doctor is not only wallowing in self hatred, someone is actually hurting him. She concentrates and senses the methodical a physic attack as the Doctor´s carefully erected walls, fall apart. Whatever it is, is digging in all his scars opening them open to make them bleed again, with the Doctor fight back in desperation and fear.

She suddenly is furious.

They are Gallyfreyan, the mightiest race in all Universe. How dare anyone else, treat someone as magnificent as a Time Lord like that? Besides, the Doctor is hers. To torture, to break, to defeat. No one else.

The Doctor screams louder than ever , as darkness surrounds his very own essence . He is not fighting back anymore. The element of surprise always important in her games with the Doctor so she has been hiding but in the second he gives up she breaks her walls and tries to reach him. She shudders as she is violently slammed out, not by the Doctor, but by what is hurting him. She tries again, but this time, she finds someone completely different. Or something. Something that recognize her as a Time Lady.

The TARDIS.

"HELP HIM" the TARDIS demands from her and The Master is part relief and part annoyed to be ordered like that.  
"You know who I am? And still want my help?" she questions, because there is no way the TARDIS has forgotten about her.  
"You are the Master. You are my thief´s oldest friend and enemy. You stole me and hurt me. But my thief is hurting and you are Time Lady and you can help him. Help him."  
" Then come over, and pick me up you old rusty bucket. And say Please, Master." She replies, arrogant as ever.  
"Please Master" The TARDIS easily replies, and that takes the fun out of it, because even if it is sentient, it does not really have a sense of pride and humiliating her serves no purpose. She feels foolish for a second and tells her to hurry up, as the Doctor distress grows.

When she comes back to her senses, Melixta is lying dead next to her, with a broken neck. So much for being gentle. Carefully closes the lifeless purple eyes and stands up, quickly dressing in a couple of black pants and white simple t-shirt. With a second thought she grabs the blue dress and keeps it in her purse, grabs her long beige coat, a late gift from Melixta.

A couple of minutes later , The TARDIS materialize, it´s cloister bell ringing and the TARDIS is wailing in panic. It´s door open wide with a snap and she enters.  
"Please Master " The TARDIS pleads again and she closes the door , walks towards the console, looking at the coordinates.

Bosphoriatux. A human planet. Year 405,012.

It is always humans with the Doctor, isn´t it?

She takes the breaks out as the TARDIS flies into the vortex.

They better hurry. She is getting a headache


	3. Rescue

When she finally gets back into the TARDIS, she is covered in blood. Most of it is from the foolish humans that tried to stop her. The rest is the Doctor´s. She is dragging his unconscious form across the room towards the TARDIS. He is to tall to be carried by her small frame even if she does not lack the strength.

The TARDIS closes her doors and immediately takes off by her own. She is surprised the level of independence the machine has, it is extraordinary, but usually everything that the Doctor touches becomes that. The gentle humming of the ship gets louder, trying to reach and comfort her pilot and a few seconds later grows distressed by the lack of answer.

She drops him a unceremoniously on the floor and kneels to examine his injuries. They are few, but those idiots made a number in his hands, a couple of fingers are broken and his wrists and ankles were a mess, from trying to break free from the restraints in the chair he found him. There were some cuts and a small circle burnings along his back, probably made with a cigar, little signs of cruelty. She takes his hand and licks the tip of his index finger, grimaces with the high level of opiates she can taste, the Doctor´s system is override by drugs.

All in all, those are not the injuries she is worried about.

She bites her lip and gently touches his cold face and attempts a mental connection. There is nothing, just white noise, a chilling static which signals no one is home. Or at least no one cares enough to answer.

Mental probes are nasty thing, which was the damn torture device she found the Doctor attached to, being attacked by a physic entity trying to acquire a new body and who thought that the last of the Time Lords was an excellent choice. The stupid apes that live in this little dark planet, adored this alien as a god and were too happy to help.

Apparently the Doctor was trying to help said humans to find a better energy source since theirs was failing and slowly killing all the population, and it was in a dinner held to his honor, where they drugged him, chained him, beat him a little to help with his confusion and offered him to their ethereal god.

So this entity called the God Shadow, by those superstitious and unoriginal wastes of space, tried to wipe the Doctor´s mind by unraveling it. Breaking it in shards, opening every wound he could find with the hope of rendering the Doctor`s consciousness and identity shattered beyond repair, making it easier to control and eventually erased.

The TARDIS had the good sense to materialize just outside the room and the screaming has been deafening. The Doctor was beyond any consciousness, his persona hiding in the deepest parts of his physique and what kept him screaming was pure animal instinct faced with terrible pain.

With her very handy knives, her chosen weapon in this body, she killed the fools that dare to do this to him and with her own screwdriver freed a convulsing, arm flailing Doctor from the machine. Without really thinking what she was doing, she put the probe on her and when this being roared in defiance and with arrogance claim it will have a Time Lady and a Time Lord, she fight it back and obliterate it as viciously as time has allowed. Her telephatic skills have always been superior than the Doctor´s in a good day and with the Doctor hurt, beaten and high as a kite, his odds where not that good. Also it help that the Master is a psychopath so her guilt and remorse, are nothing compared to the Doctor, which has the perfect fuel for this particular torture.

(She has her regrets. All concerning to the foolish man she was rescuing)

She shakes her head, trying to dispel the image of the Doctor´s wide open eyes, no recognition in them as he snarl at her like a wild animal when she tried to touch him, his floppy hair sticked to his bony face with blood and sweat. The Master has always been practical when not showing off. She knocked him unconscious, not feeling the satisfaction she may have found in other occasion in smacking her fellow Time Lord.

What follows was the predictable sequence of events, the humans tried to stop her, rambling about some prophecy and the Doctor being their savior. She killed all of them, her knives and technique, flawless and merciless, with not joy at all, efficient and cold. When she is done with pulling the Doctor back to the living, she will come back and burn the whole fucking planet.

For now, she has to get him to the infirmary.

"Why do you have to be so tall? You are like a giraffe seriously" she points at the still silent man accusingly. "Oi, help me get him to the infirmary" she asks to the TARDIS. "I need to detox him and see if after that I can reach him"

The TARDIS complies with a little mobile bed and the door of the infirmary the nearest it could be materialized. She slowly drags the unconscious man towards the bed.

"Tall, skinny and heavy as a rock. I bet you feed from biscuits, bananas and jelly babies" she exclaims and pauses a second to take a deep breathe, to focus in the next steps.

To keep herself calm.

She is worried that if the Doctor is hiding to deep, she may not be able to find him, bring him back. Or if that she finds him, he will be too far gone. When she step inside the room where he was being held, she saw many time lines and one of them contain a dark broken Doctor, unstoppable and raving mad. And if that comes to be, she and the whole Universe are pretty much done.

With a grunt , she finally gets him on the rolling bed, arms and legs dangling from it. She looks at the ruined bow tie in his neck and with steady fingers takes it away, keeping it in her coat`s pockets. She then finds the pulses of two beating hearts, slow and steady.

"For Rassilon, you are truly a pain in the ass" she says, voice too soft to be really annoyed as she rolls him inside the infirmary.


	4. Preparations

Five hours later, an unconscious Doctor lies clean and bandaged in the medical bay, in a pair of fresh pajamas. The Master sits next to him, a hot cup of tea in her hand. She is free from all blood after a quick bath. The blue dress shows a discrete amount of cleavage and falls just above the knees, more appropriate for a cocktail party than for taking care of your best enemy after a physic attack.

She looks at the readings that are displaying in front of her and detox is going too slow, the scan of his brain chemicals all wrong and the white noise that invade her ears when she taps in his mind a total contradiction to the brain activity shown in the charts.

The Doctor is not healing. Like regeneration, for Time Lords to recover they have to put their minds to it, work with the body to accelerate the healing process. That is why a healing comma is so useful, because then all you efforts goes into getting better. And apparently this old man is not making any effort at all.

"Is this some kind of revenge against me?" she asks as she finishes her cup. She remembers the Doctor`s desperation when her handsome Harold Saxon self, did not regenerate. All the crying and man angst. "Because it is not going to work, I am not a foolish sentimental like you" She is not waiting for an answer, but can´t help a pang of disappointment for the lack of it. His silence and stillness irritates her, not even when he was a decrepit old man the Doctor kept still.

She remembers a day when a young Doctor fell down from one of the trees in the academy. He was knocked unconscious and her young self, had screamed in terror thinking that the quiet form in front of him was dead, used to Tetha talking even in his sleep.

Her irritation, turns to fury, and the silence is broken by the sound of her hand slapping him in the cheek. The Doctor always makes things so complicated.

"I will steal your TARDIS. The stupid isomorphic controls you installed will not make a difference. I have always been better at mechanics than you. I will steal it, and destroy your stupid little Earth. No conquer, destroy. Do you hear me? I will blow it to pieces, watch all your little apes burn" she threatens him and for a second she means it.

The only change in him is the red mark spreading on the left cheek where she slapped him. She stares at him in concentration, memorizing this face, which is too thin, pale and young.

Knowing the Doctor, it is some kind of mask, part of his strategy. They say you cannot choose how you end looking in a reincarnation, and that is mostly true, but also a lie. You unconsciously have the idea of who you need to be, which form will be the best for your next part of the trip. Being a woman, may have something to do at how impress she was with the strength and devious ways of both Martha Jones and Lucy Saxon.

Probably she should leave and let him die. That way she will have her way free, no one to stop her in her universe domination plans. The Time Lords will remain trapped forever in that loop and she will be able to shape the Universe as she pleases.

Instead she settles down in the sofa next to his bed. "Listen I need to sleep . If he needs something, then solve it. I am not to be disturbed" she says to the TARDIS and gets as comfortable as she can. She needs her rest because when she wakes, she will attempt to go looking properly in his mind.

She falls sleep with the TARDIS gentle humming and the Doctor's slow breathing in the background


	5. Inside

She makes all the pertinent preparations. She links both of them to the TARDIS console so that if something goes terrible wrong, the machine can help. TARDISes are capable of making deep meaningful connections between it and their pilots. In this particular case, she suspects the bond goes beyond the normal limits and she can use all the help she can get. She sets up a nutrition line in both of them, she does not know how much time it will take. She quietly cleans him up, changes his pijamas and shaves his face. Next she lies next to him and gently holds his large hand, cold and still and takes a plunge into the Doctor's mind.

As she enters The Doctor´s mind she finds it is not the dark pit she was expecting judging by the static she heard before. She is surrounded no by memories and thoughts, but a Doctirnesh she can´t possibly describe. As she makes the connection stronger and settles down a physic mental projection so she can explore, there are thousand of colors, caothic images and concepts floating around, everything brilliant, weird and fantastic as their owner. There is this fierce love and endless compassion, and she fears her hearts may burst, there is loneliness and regret and she feels like those same hearts will break. Everything the Doctor is, surrounds her and for a second he is like the Universe itself, truly the lonely god. The TARDIS helps her, her soothing presence anchoring her.

Suddenly she finds herself standing in the middle of a cold beach, and the TARDIS provides a name. Bad Wolf Bay. It is night, all the galaxies condensed in a single Earth sky and in the center of it, there is it, in the center of it all.

Gallifrey.

Turning and burning, and the Master finds it extremely beautiful. Good riddance. She has no love for her planet. She has no love for the society that leash her, mark her, manipulate her. (He is the only one she loved. Loves. Will love)

She shakes her head, focus her thoughts and blocking her own feelings. Looks around and finds there is no path, no road to follow. It is just an endless beach, the furious sea and the darkness with it´s thousand galaxies.

"Doctor" her voice breaks the static and she feels slightly better. "Doctor, where are you hiding?"

She walks following the line of the beach, calling the stubborn man. She can hear the TARDIS, singing, calling him.

"Thief. My thief. Where are you?"

She wonders not for the first time, how dependant the TARDIS and the Doctor are from each other. As she walks she finds ghosts from the past. The TARDIS whispers the names of those she does not recognize. There is the Freak and fierce Martha Jones. There is a girl name Rose Tyler, pink, yellow and soft. A ginger, loud and loyal, Donna Noble. AldricRomanaSusanSarahJaneSmithMikeSmithAstridPethAlastair They stare at her as she walks across the beach, and suddenly there are thousands, and the TARDIS falls silent, as apparently she does not remember all of them. She sees herself, as she was once.

She sighs and ignores them as they are not a threat. "Doctor where are you? I am not interested in knowing all the poor sods you have saved once" she says outloud just to slice the heavy silence that was settling down again.

"No friends. This is the people The Doctor destroyed" suddenly a tiny voice she has nor hear for centuries says next to her. She looks down and finds a very young Doctor, when he was still going by the name of Thete Sigma. He must be no more than seven years old, just about to become eight. Just before the schism.  
"Doctor"  
The boy makes a face and shakes his head "I am not the Doctor. He asked me to come and tell you to leave. Also consider this as your only warning"  
"Oh, how considerate of him. What will happen if I choose to ignore his warning?"  
The boy shrugs. "Then he is not responsible of what may happen. He is dying. His mind is a chaos too big. This was created for you, so you don´t get lost"  
"Don´t you care he dies?" she asks, curious with the strange detachment in his tone.  
"I am already dead. Just a memory, am I not? He is old, he is broken and he is done. Those were his words"  
"So what, he is only going to give up?"  
"Yes" The boy looks up at him and the Master smiles in triumph, got ya. Those eyes are too old and too tired, to belong to the boy he once was friends with.  
She sighs and kneels next to him, so she is at his same height.  
"You are a coward you know? After all the bitching you did about me not dying, you are giving up"  
"The kettle talking to the pot. You ran away from the War!" the child answers back, angry and defensive.  
"Yes I did. And hide myself. I am a psychopath but it was too much, even for me. The Nightmare Children. The Desolation. And then, the news you have stolen The Moment" she grabs thin shaking shoulders. "I was so afraid. You, The Doctor, driven to take such measures"  
"I Am no the Doctor" the child emphasizes, trying to break her hold on him.  
"Of course you are, even if you look as sweet as you were once"  
The image dissolves, and in front of her appears the Doctor, as he was in his tenth incarnation. Slim and rigid, fabulous hair and wearing his brown strip suit. She remembers asking for a mini suit for him when her last incarnation convert him in the little dwarf he truly is.  
While Thethe anger was amusing , the look the Doctor was given her, was threathening. Ah, the Oncoming Storm

She stands up. "That is better. Talking with an adult. But hardly makes it a difference, does it?" she manages to say.  
"Leave. I don't want your help" the Doctor spats, his voice dark and angry.  
"Oh, so rude. Not even a thank you, I am trying to save your skinny ass"  
" I am not nice" he replies and smiles, his not nice at all smile. " I am known for being rude and not ginger. Leave"  
"I just saved you and the whole Universe if you think about it. Can you imagine what kind of mischief an evil entity can do while wearing your body? So much knowledge and nearly immortal, with the trust of many powerful people in time and space. Oh, maybe I should snatch it"  
The Doctor is not amused.  
"Is why are you here? To torment me? But you know what…be my guest. Take the body and do whatever the hell you want" he finally says and turns around, walking towards a big tree that appear from nowhere. One she recognizes perfectly and finds it out of place in the middle of an earthling beach. It used to be her favorite tree, tall and proud, silver leaves reflecting the sun. How many times did they climb that thing?  
"Oh I think I will keep this body. I kind of like it. What do you think?" she says as turns around. His expression softens a little, but his face is still marred with sadness and despair. She finds herself wanting to make him smile that stupid grin of his.  
"You are very pretty. Mistress?"  
"Master. It is my title after all" she sits next to him and stares at the horizon, where a dark cloud is forming. It is darkness and it is oblivion.  
"You are so dramatic" she points out at the cloud.  
"This is not a game!" The Doctor barks and looks up at her, taking her hands. He is too warm, and isn´t that strange, this is just a mental plane, her body and his lying in the infirmary, her hand resting on his chest.  
"I need you to get out, this place is going to hell and I can´t have another death on my conscience. I am too tired. The Doctor is done, so please Koschei, if you once love me…just leave. The TARDIs will take wherever you want and then deactivate. The Universe will go on, and I will be able to rest" he says his voice sad. He breathes deeply and closes his eyes, shoulders slumped forward.  
"You are actually giving up"  
"Yes. The Shadow show me what I am. I have destroy countless people lives and my own planet. I have failed. I am not making the universe a better place. I am a monster"  
She bites her lip and she is about to leave him, let him rot for all she cares, because this is ridiculous. The Doctor´s self pity is insulting to her. "Really Doctor? You have save thousands of billions. You have save the Universe countless of times. You have died for it! What the hell are you talking about being a monster?" she knows she sounds like one of her jumping female apes cheerleaders.  
"LEAVE" he growls again and grabs her wrist, pulling her up while trying to push her out of his mind.  
"NO" she screams and stubbornly looks up at him.  
Suddenly the sky darkens and a lighting crosses the sky.

"Why? Why do you want to save me? When did you start caring?" The Doctor says in desperation, looking at her with eyes full of sorrow.

And that is why she hates him. Because he has never understood. The Doctor with all his genius and brilliance, does not see what is obvious in front of him. Because he has never seen her.

Before she answer him, the storm gets loose as the Doctor wails. All hell breaks loose and they are thrown in thousand memories.

She holds his hand and does not let go.


	6. Koschei and Tethe

She is an excellent telepath. That is how you can hypnotized a whole world. And apparently that is how you survive a malestrom of regret and pain that is not yours.

The storm hits her and threatens to swallow her, but she holds her ground never letting go of him. The TARDIS sings to both of them, a comforting light to reach and pull themselves out of the darkness. They are children again, she is Koschei and he is Tethe and they lie next to each other, arms encircling the small of his back, there was a time the Doctor was the short one, and they watch as dark clouds swallow the two suns forever, how the silver infinite of the fields they used to play in, light up in fire. Rose, Donna, Martha, Alric, Sarah Jane, Jack, all the companions burn and with them soldiers, houses, entire planets and Tethe trembles, because it is too much and it is because of him. Koschei looks frantically for the memories of people looking adoringly to their savior, of his name being said like a prayer, of Rose´s tender love and Donna´s fierce loyalty but they are overloaded by pain and darkness and so much self doubt.

The Doctor is not lying, he is tired and feels betrayed and feels like he has nothing more to give. He just wants to rest and sleep, because he does not see the point anymore. He is alone, his people are dead and he refuses to take anymore human companions, so fragile, so easy to destroy.

One thousand years, and the Doctor has finally broke by no one but himself.

"Please. Please, leave. I want it to end. Please, Koschei, I am begging you" Tethe whimpers and he brings his hands to his eyes, covering them, but in the darkness the images which usually plagued his nightmares still replay in an endless loop.

Koschei takes an executive decision. The Master and the kid he used to be, know they will regret this. Gently, slowly, they take the trembling hand away and make their friend, their enemy, their only rival to look at them.

Koschei smiles.

"I will travel with you" he says and steadies the shaking hands of his friend. "You promise me once, we will travel among the stars together. You are always harassing me to let you show me, how wonderful and amazing this Universe is. So, I am saying yes."

"Koschei, I can´t anymore, I…"

"You promise me, Tethe. You may be a liar and broken thousand of promises as the Doctor, but never as the boy I knew. Come on, Tethe, Doctor, whoever you are. Show me. Show me why you love this universe so much"

"Why? Why now? Why do you care?"

Koschei smiles softly and blue eyes meet brown ones. Foolish blind man.

Time to be brave.

"Isn´t it obvious stupid? Because losing you will break both my hearts"

And then her small once self kisses the crying boy, sweetly, as they used to do when exploring each other and holds his hand over his hearts.

The dice is on the air.

"Alright" The little boy whimpers , tears in his eyes, as they broke the kiss.

"Make the question Doctor" hands still entwine together.

"Master, will you do me the honor to travel with me?"

"Yes Doctor. I will travel with you"

"Good"

And just like that, like a fucking fairy tale, because things with the Doctor sometimes are cliches, she feels the pull conciousness break the dream in thousand pieces.

She wakes up to find dark green eyes staring at her. She is all groggy, her head hurts and the light is too intense for her eyes, but she keeps them open, staring back. None of them move and she suddenly is afraid that the Doctor broke his promise and did not come back. After what feels like hours, a trembling long bony hands reaches out.

She grabs it and holds it tight.


	7. First Encounters

She did not know what she was expecting but this is ridiculous. After falling asleep holding hands like they were still at the Academy, two young strange children lying together to give comfort to each other, she wakes up to find herself alone in the infirmary. The Master wanders through the halls, mental walls back in place and walks towards the console where she finds him under the TARDIS console. The Doctor is rather ignoring her or too concentrated in whatever he is trying to do, which does not seem easy with crooked mangled fingers.

"You should really wait till your fingers are healed" she says finally says as his screwdriver falls from his fingers.

The Doctor lifts his head and a smile spreads through it and looks almost real, but it does not reach his eyes. She wonders how many times the Doctor smiles like that to his companions, how easily he wears his "I am fine" mask. And damn stupid apes they believe him, because even when they learn the Doctor´s past and ghosts, even after they see the darkness and the pain and watch how much is lost when the Doctor fails, they still believe him when he claims to be okay.

Well that game is over. The Doctor opens his mouth to say something and she interrupts him, one finger pointing at him. "If you are about to say you are fine I swear by Rassilon I will break all your fingers again" The Doctor closes his mouth and shakes his head.

"Good morning to you too. I was just checking you did not do anything to my TARDIS"

"I did not do anything to your TARDIS. I was too busy saving your ass" she says but it is not offended. After all, in any other circumstances she probably will have do something to the TARDIS.

"And for that, I thank you. I am so sorry about..." he starts but she interrupts him. "Stop apologizing. You say sorry so much, that I am not sure you still understand the meaning" she looks at him again and sighs. He is still too pale and she can see the slight trembling in his hands. "I am hungry and cranky, so why don´t you come with me to the room you call kitchen, because seriously I could not find anything but custard, fish fingers and tea. I will prepare us a nice cuppa , check your fingers and you tell me why you only have that crap to eat"

He looks at her for a moment and there is a mixture of gratitude, hope, but mainly distrust. Can she blame him? No. But a tiny bit of her left heart pangs with sadness at the realization that he distrusts her. Damn tiny bit always does.

"Look, it is easy. Come with me to the kitchen or follow your insticts and chain me to the console, but decide already. I am tired of your man angst"

"Okay" he replies and walks towards her.

And that is how the Master finds herself chained to the console, cursing the Doctor as he exits the room as fast as his mangled self can.


	8. Trust

He runs towards the library. The Master is shouting at him and for the first time he realizes she is speaking Gallifreyan.

How this came to be? The Master in the TARDIS and apparently wanting to be his companion. It is too surreal to be true and he wishes it is real, but he is too shaken and wary.

The Shadow dig into memories too painful and too recent that were bury deep thanks to regeneration. He is the man that forgets in contrast to the last one who was the man who regrets. All his mistakes, loses; all his guilt and pain were used against him and almost succeed in breaking him.

He stops at the door of the library his breathing too fast and a wave of dizziness comes upon him.

He was ready to let go. He was ready to let it take him, because he is so so tired. He has lost too much and the Universe never stops asking. He, Time´s Champion is so tired.

Time´s answer? The Master. His savior happens to be the one who has opposed him most viciously across said time and space. How he can trust that? How he can believe his oldest friend and best enemy is here to help?

Suddenly small hands grab his face as the Doctor realizes he is on his knees, breathing almost impossible. The hands are very nice, he thinks. Warm, not hot like human hands are most of the time. These are comfortable warm hands, smell like time, atron energy. Home.

"Doctor, breathe" the Master orders and he does. He closes his eyes and takes deep breathes, the TARDIS gentle song and those firm gentle hands, anchoring him down, to control the wibbly wobbly mess of his emotions.

"Thank you" he whispers as sits down, eyes still closed. She lets him go.

"Do you feel better?"

"Yes"

"Good"

And without warning, she slaps him. Hard enough to make Jackie Tyler proud.

He opens her eyes in pain and surprise only to find her standing up, hands on her hips looking down at him. She is short and pretty, but the fire in her eyes and the power that seems to surround her makes her look every inch as dangerous as she is.

"Never chain me again, do you hear me? I am not your prisoner. If you don´t want me traveling with you, I can leave. I don´t need your crap. I am The Master and I deserve"

His reaction surprises him as much as her. He throws himself against her, hugging her legs and almost throwing her to the floor.

"Please don´t. Don´t leave. I can´t, I can´t be alone again " he is babbling and is this not embarrassing?

The Master sighs loudly and he waits to be mocked and rejected. After all she once let herself die just to spite him.

"Doctor, you need to calm down" and she is speaking English now, her accent soft and american. Good. It does not hurt as much as like their dead language.

_( Jack. Jack. American accents always make him think of Jack)_

"Blimey, I am a wreck, am I not?" he asks suddenly feeling childish and stupid. He still mistrusts this strange woman but can´t let her go. She being here means he is not the only one anymore.

"You have always been Doctor. A crazy insufferable wreck" she answers and he can´t help flinching.

Those perfect warm hands touch his chin again and lift his face up. She is smiling now, a bright brilliant smile with a pinch of mad and broken, the smile of those who suffer, survive and are proud to tell their story.

"But so I am"

And once more, in less than 24 hours, she offers her hand to help him up. Such a little gesture, so much meaning. He takes it and he stands up, his legs a unsteady. She is shorter than him, but almost everybody is.

"I don´t trust you" he blurts out, because he finds it is the main problem with this travel together idea.

"You have already said that. It is good, actually. That means you are just crazy , not crazy and stupid. Just don´t chain me again. If you do I will leave"

"I will not. Thinking about that, how did you get free?"

She smiles and shows him her hand, a silver ring with a red Stone on her finger. Ah, clever lady. Sonic ring.

"It is very handy. A gift from my late husband. But mainly the TARDIS allowed it, she has been very cooperative . This time it seems I am even allow to have hot water" she deadpans.

And he can`t help to laugh. It is a honest loud laugh, because this is silly and impossible and utterly brilliant. It is infectious and she joins him after a couple of seconds. When they can finally stop laughing and he is wiping tears from his eyes the Doctor feels slightly better and his smile more real.

"Well now. I am still hungry. So kitchen. Tea, breakfast and then we talk" she says arranging her dress which was wrinkled after his little clingy display

"Talk?"

"Talk. Your favorite thing in the universe. But really if we are doing this, we have to set some rules, don´t you think?"

He looks at her, and this is the first time since he left Amy and Rory after the Minotaur fiasco he feels something like hope.

He is not alone.

He nods "After you, Master" he courtesies and shows her the door.

"Thank you, Doctor" she courtesies back and steps out of the room.


End file.
